Tuesday, November 09, 2004
Six days. I don't know what I did wrong, if anything. What I forgot, or remembered.
I promised no tears, but it is getting harder with each passing day. You're my love, my Master, my closest friend. I miss you, and I don't know what is wrong. Are you all right? If you weren't, would I ever know?
Sometimes it feels as though you're very close, and I could almost reach out and touch you. I talk to you all the time. It doesn't even feel strange any more, talking to the computer screen. But of course it never responds. (and when it does is when we really have to start to worry.) And recently, you don't respond.
I tell you that I love you every morning when I wake up and every night before I go to sleep. I know you don't see it, and even if you did you probably wouldn't be able to tell what I was saying, but that's what I do. And I sing all the sappy sad songs along with VH1. Hoobastank, Train, Joss Stone (please don't tell anyone) Averil Lavigne (really don't tell anyone about that. I'd never live it down.)
I know. I can hear you telling me that I need to cultivate patience. Yes, the little voice in my head - that's your voice. Still, I worry. More with each passing day.
Perhaps sometime soon.
I promised no tears, but it is getting harder with each passing day. You're my love, my Master, my closest friend. I miss you, and I don't know what is wrong. Are you all right? If you weren't, would I ever know?
Sometimes it feels as though you're very close, and I could almost reach out and touch you. I talk to you all the time. It doesn't even feel strange any more, talking to the computer screen. But of course it never responds. (and when it does is when we really have to start to worry.) And recently, you don't respond.
I tell you that I love you every morning when I wake up and every night before I go to sleep. I know you don't see it, and even if you did you probably wouldn't be able to tell what I was saying, but that's what I do. And I sing all the sappy sad songs along with VH1. Hoobastank, Train, Joss Stone (please don't tell anyone) Averil Lavigne (really don't tell anyone about that. I'd never live it down.)
I know. I can hear you telling me that I need to cultivate patience. Yes, the little voice in my head - that's your voice. Still, I worry. More with each passing day.
Perhaps sometime soon.
