Conversation

Well, isn't this a fine kettle of fish? I may very well be losing my job tomorrow. And guess what - I really don't give a rat's ass any more. I am so tired of screwing around with the whole damned thing that I think it might just be a relief. And since the alternative is a month of twenty hour days, I'm just about ready to tell them what they can do with it.

But you know I won't. I sure would like to, though. It might just make everything a little less complicated as well. Strike that. It would make most of my life truly hellish, wouldn't it? Yeah, I know. But sometimes it just sounds so good. Get rid of everything, and start over someplace a little less crazy. And a heck of a lot less expensive.

But then I think about my obligations, and I get right back on that horse, don't I? Yep. Every time. I'll find a way to work this one out as well. It may very well mean going without sleep for a while, and making some not so fun decisions, but I'll meet the deadline. If I still have one after tonight.

(Is it so very wrong of me to kind of hope I don't?)

Well, only person I can really talk honestly with, I suppose I had better get something useful accomplished this evening, huh? (Really, all I have planned is going to bed early and hoping I wake up having had just one more bad dream.) (I know. No such luck. My bad dreams always wind up with me screaming at the boss, not with her screaming at me.)

Wish me luck. Either way. (and please keep a good thought that I manage not to cry this time. I hate doing that.)

I do wish you were around. You're easier to talk to than most. And you always find a way to make me feel better.